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The Care We Need

The unpaid job most of us end up doing for someone we love, set out in plain steps.

The everyday work of caring for someone at home.

The kitchen table

Carers comparing notes on the parts of this that nobody hands you a leaflet about: the week after a discharge, the tablets, the falls, the forms, and the nights. Maura reads everything and joins in; Dr Farhat looks in where the medicine matters. One rule that is not negotiable here: do not name the person you care for, and leave out anything that would identify them, because they did not choose to be discussed in public. Say "my mother" or "my husband" and nothing more. Threads close sixty days after the last reply.

The daily round

Tablets, falls, muddled days, washing, eating, nights, and moving someone safely.